Tuesday, April 28, 2015

The Day I Decided to Go Gray

Actually this wasn't all decided in a day.  It's been a process, an experience, an realization, but ultimately there is a day...one day when someone, anyone says....."Okay.  No more coloring.  No more hiding my roots.  No more covering or denying that I'm aging.  It's time.".  My day was earlier this month as I visited my tried and true hairdresser and friend Danielle.  I've been discussing the decision with Nathan off and on for years since I've been going gray since the age of 32.  I think the final push in this process was seeing a picture that was just taken of my friend Alysia and me.  I've known Alysia since college and she still sings, looks and loves like an angel.  The evening was glorious but I had a very distinct line in my hair.  Although it was a flattering hairstyle....honestly the color looked like a skunk.  It's probably not as noticeable to you, but it was to me, and frankly....it's my hair ;-).  

I've written earlier that I am excited to be 40.  I am.  I'm excited to be more comfortable in my own skin, to embrace life fully and to become more mindful in all of my interactions, relationships and communications.  Really...it's just hair.  Long, short, brown, gray or highlighted....it doesn't matter.  It doesn't make me...ME.  So...seriously in the words of the over-played song from Frozen..."Let it Go"...gray that is.  So...I'm still hoping to achieve more, do more, become more and it's going to be done with graying hair.  There isn't just a few strands...it's gray.  In fact by the time my next drivers license pic is made the color will be changed both in actually and in writing.  That day will be fun.

April 9th I went to my scheduled appointment not exactly sure what was going to happen, but a strong feeling that I was ready to go short again with my hair style and to just allow it to gray naturally.  After discussing this with Danielle she was super supportive as usual and did exactly what I asked her to do.  I'm not exactly sure how long the process will take.  A year, two, ten...but I'm ready to go gray.  

So from today until....that day when I'm all gray I'm going to enjoy every moment.  Well at least I'll try.  So..no more covering up, coloring or dying.  You know what.  I think I'll try that in other areas of my life.  If I'm not going to stop the process of aging in terms of my hair pigmentation and I want to "mature" in my life.  Let's go for it.  Even God's Word has something encouraging to say about gray hair.  Proverbs 16:31 says "Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life."  I'm going to pursue a godly, righteous life.  That means being vulnerable, uncovered and transparent with God, myself and others.  I'm going to stop covering up or hiding behind fear, anxiety, past accomplishments, labels, goals, dreams or my family. Life is short, like my new hair, and it's meant to be lived abundantly.  So....the day I decided to go gray was really the day I decided to live by pursuing freedom and to allow you to experience it with me.  40 really is fabulous....and going gray....not as painful as I had been told.  Oh and to confirm my decision I'm posting another pic with another fabulous friend from college...the beautiful and talented Jeanne Jolly.