Friday, May 21, 2010

15 Things That I Love About Nathan

These are the things about Nathan that still make me smile after 15 years. There are MANY more (but I can't type

1. His heart-Nathan LOVES the Lord. He has such a soft heart. His relationship with His Savior is sweet and tender. He loves Jesus more than he loves me and this makes me smile.

2. His love-Nathan is NOT a romantic in fact he sucks at it. How can I love that? Well it's taken MANY years to get through this. I'll admit that nothing would make me smile more than to be whisked away on a spontaneous, romatic outing or to receive flowers JUST BECAUSE or to have love notes waiting for me on my pillow. BUT...that's NOT Nathan. He loves me by working EVERY DAY in a job that he struggles with. He loves me by fighting consistent and debilitating depression and remaining with us. He loves me by mowing the grass and cooking breakfast almost every Saturday. He loves me by keeping our cars running smoothly. He loves me by playing with our children. He loves me by bringing me coffee on Sunday mornings. He loves me by not expecting our house to be perfectly clean. Get the idea??? He loves me uniquely and completely...just in different ways than the norm.

3. His voice- If you haven't heard him...HE CAN SING!!! When Nathan sings praises to the Lord I am always moved to tears. Nathan's heart desire is to sing full time. I pray that the Lord grants this wish. I would SOOOO dig being his back up singer. Nathan rocks my socks even when singing lullabies or rock band/guitar hero songs.

4. His vulnerability- Nathan has been through a lot. He has a past that would make most shy away from love, but he through Jesus is overcoming this. He has been COMPLETELY and TOTALLY honest with me about who he is, what he's done, what has been done to him, how he handled it...etc. I know every hurt, habit and hang-up and love him even more deeply and tenderly because of it.

5. His passion- He wants to be the best at everything he does. Whether this is a job, a skill or trade, a hobby...It doesn't matter. Nathan gives his all to whatever he tries. I appreciate this and am grateful that he is instilling this character trait in our children.

6. His smile- I appreciate this more and more every day. There was a long time I didn't see him smile. He struggled with 18 months of life changing depression. That smile I missed is back and I am grateful to God. Granted I don't see it everyday, but when I do it ROCKS MY WORLD!!!

7. His sense of humor- Nathan is by nature an introvert so when he comes out of his turtle shell long enough to get silly it is a treasure. When he tells a joke, says something sarcastic, or just has plain old fun I enjoy this immensely. Nathan really is a funny guy and that's why it's such a gift to see this side of him. I am grateful that he puts up with me. I am silly more than I should be, and am often sarcastic and caustic. I am witty and can use that to be manipulative and cruel sometimes. Not what humor was intended for at all. I admit it's a character flaw. That's why Nathan's humor is so refreshing. It's honest and pure. Almost child-like.

8. His knowledge- Nathan is very knowledgable at lots of things. I used to joke about him being Bob Villa by day and Martha Stewart by night. He is mechanically AND musically minded, an odd combination. He is a percussionist and vocalist. He can cook better than I do. He can sew and iron. He can repair large and small engines. He can build and repair houses. There isn't much Nathan can't do and I'm so grateful. He truly completes me. The Lord knew I needed someone to fulfill all of my inadequacies (too many to name). Nathan is my better half.

9. His kiss- once again something that I don't take for granted these days. Life is hard right now. It's busy and complicated and dificult some days. Yes there are days that go by that I don't kiss my husband. This doesn't make him a bad man. It just is the way it is right now. So, when Nathan is present with me enough and emotionally available enough to kiss me unprompted it makes my world spin. I like all kinds of kisses. Any time that man puckers up I ENJOY IT!!!

10. His Obsessive Compulsive Disorder/Depression- WOW! What an odd thing to type. Once again a hard one, but a gift non the less. His OCD has drawn us closer. Most people divorce these days. Many of our friends are divorced or going through a divorce. Yet we just celebrated 15 years and are happier now than ever. Why??? Well one of the reasons is because we have been in counseling together for many years. Although right now we are not seeing anyone, for years we did. Because Nathan finally sought help for his chemical imbalance and other issues we got some stuff out in the open. Counseling kept us together. Please don't get me wrong. Sitting there in front of Len Cruz for years wasn't easy. Hearing things I didn't want to hear. Saying things I really didn't want to say. Crying tears I wish weren't shed. ALL WORTH IT!!! I know Nathan. I love Nathan. I accept Nathan. There are many up-sides to OCD.

11. His ability to let go of things- As passionate as Nathan can be and obsessive at times he also has the ability to disconnect. This is something I don't have the ability to do. I hold onto everything (literally and emotionally). I am a packrat (genetic predisposition). My mother is a hoarder. My Nannie was a hoarder. I am fighting this DAILY. Nathan doesn't like cards. Don't get me wrong when I get him a card he reads it, says thank you and then throws it promptly in the trash. This used to PEAVE ME OFF. Now I understand we don't have the room or need to save these things. Nathan knows I love him. He doesn't need piles of paper to prove it. Why do I??? Still wondering this!!! Anyway...he also can disconnect emotionally. He forgives people when they hurt him. He doesn't stew over it or hold onto emotional baggage for YEARS like I do. I LOVE this quality he has, and am praying that I can learn it someday.

12. His love for our children- Nathan is a GREAT daddy. He is strong and gentle. Loving and able to discipline. He is fun and serious. He cares and lets go. He knows when to get involved and when to back off of things. He loves, loves, loves his children. I love watching him parent. I love the fact that he was with me during all three deliveries. He was an excellent labor support person in every situation and circumstance. He takes care of the children emotionally, physically, financially and spirtually. He shows them Christ and that's the greatest gift of all.

13. His physical attributes- What woman doesn't think her man is the most handsome ever? Yes I know Nathan is overweight. Yes I know he's not a GQ cover model. It's ok. I love him just the way he is. Would I like him to change? Yes, but I'm sure he would like me to change too. Nathan has gorgeous eyes, a sweet smile, good hair, srong hands...I could go on and on but I won't. I think he's the most handsome man I've ever seen and it still makes my heart skip a beat to see him walk in a room.

14. His ability to dream- Some day we'll own a timber frame house that Nathan helped build. Someday we'll go on a cruise. Someday Nathan will sing with a Christian group. Someday we'll be out of debt. Someday Nathan will own a business. Someday he'll go back to school for a degree in counseling. Someday...He dreams and he shares those dreams. We don't live in the future, we don't dwell on it...we just keep each other encouraged by dreaming. I'm glad Nathan does this.

15. His choices- I love that he chose me. He could have done a lot better for a wife, but he chose me and I will be FOREVER grateful.

So fifteen things for fifteen years. I love you Nathan. Something else I love about you is that you'll never even read this. You hate the Maybe I'll print it off and read it too you???? It's ok. I hope whomever reads this knows how much I love you and am loved by you. Happy Anniversary Nathan Roy Flint. I love you!!!


Alecia said...

That is to sweet!!!!! Nathan is a lucky guy!!!! =)

Cristina said...

Janelle, that blog means alot. You made me stop and think about my husband and why he is so wonderful in his own not perfect way. We will be married 16yrs in Dec. and I think we love each other more now than ever. All of the troubles we have gone thru and with the hard but wonderful gift of having two special needs kids to raise, we are stronger than ever. I refuse to let our marriage be just another broken family with autism! Thank you for sharing this with us!! love you!

Nathan, Janelle, Joseph, Jesse, JoyAnn, Jonathan and James!!! said...

Thanks guys for the encouragement.

Cristina...I TOTALLY AGREE. The divorce rate in America is 50% but it's even HIGHER in families with autistic children. I praise the Lord that our families will NOT be just another statistic. I'm inspired by you. I will agree to pray for your marriage if you will do the same (you too Alecia).

Amanda Ogle said...

That is quite possibly the most beautiful thing I have read in a long time. Thank you for being a wife who is willing to stand up and brag on her husband when so many choose to belittle them for their misgivings! As women and wives, a few more of us need to follow your lead!

mimito5 said...

Honey, that was such an awesome and precious post! I think you should read it to him....but then I would say And, even "I" want to tell him to read it, but will not, because then he probably won't want to read it for sure...hahahaha. Now I'm sitting here trying to think of 36 reasons I love "HIS" dad.......hmmmmmm, I'll eventually get there but it may take a while:))

Nathan, Janelle, Joseph, Jesse, JoyAnn, Jonathan and James!!! said...

So I printed it off on Sunday and gave it to him. He read it and seemed very moved. As moved as Nathan can You know he is a "man of a thousand faces" hahahaha!

At least now he knows that my love for him is public. He also knows specifically what I care the most about. I pray he was encouraged.